Author Topic: Duke attempts the Impossible  (Read 1412577 times)

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duke3016

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Re: Duke attempts the Impossible
« Reply #2475 on: September 11, 2010, 15:19:46 PM »
OK Bounties for the September Fest.

If you knock any of these players out of the tournament you will receive two bottles of Quality Red Wine.

Dan O
Rob S
Asa
Paul Mc
Michelle
Dawn


duke3016

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Re: Duke attempts the Impossible
« Reply #2476 on: September 13, 2010, 22:23:13 PM »
I have a dell streak. It's great for what it does (it's a phone as well but if you use it you look like a throwback to the 80's). When I left work today I decided to test out the sat nav. So I locked in home and set off. It was very impressive, very accurate and had the new road layout outside our estate.

The voice was crisp and clear and easy to follow.

Anyway I decided I needed to replenish the fridge and headed for Morrisons. The Streak adjusted as I deviated and I was impressed with the speed of the recalc. I pulled up in the car park and took the Streak out of the holder and pressed the power button which blanks and locks the screen and popped it in my pocket.

As I was approaching the end of the booze aisle after gathering my on offer Grolsch I was held up a wee bit by a couple of aged shoppers.

Then my pocket said "Make a U turn when possible and turn immediately right"

The couples turned round and I said "It's the new shopper aid"

One of the Ladies said "OH we must get one of those Bert"


Priceless

Waz1892

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Re: Duke attempts the Impossible
« Reply #2477 on: September 13, 2010, 22:28:56 PM »

I have a dell streak. It's great for what it does (it's a phone as well but if you use it you look like a throwback to the 80's). When I left work today I decided to test out the sat nav. So I locked in home and set off. It was very impressive, very accurate and had the new road layout outside our estate.

The voice was crisp and clear and easy to follow.

Anyway I decided I needed to replenish the fridge and headed for Morrisons. The Streak adjusted as I deviated and I was impressed with the speed of the recalc. I pulled up in the car park and took the Streak out of the holder and pressed the power button which blanks and locks the screen and popped it in my pocket.

As I was approaching the end of the booze aisle after gathering my on offer Grolsch I was held up a wee bit by a couple of aged shoppers.

Then my pocket said "Make a U turn when possible and turn immediately right"

The couples turned round and I said "It's the new shopper aid"

One of the Ladies said "OH we must get one of those Bert"


Priceless



pmsl...that is quick!
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duke3016

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Re: Duke attempts the Impossible
« Reply #2478 on: September 14, 2010, 00:39:33 AM »
I love my life - why ?

tomorrow I will tell all

Quasar

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Re: Duke attempts the Impossible
« Reply #2479 on: September 14, 2010, 18:38:32 PM »

I love my life - why ?

tomorrow I will tell all



Why can"t you tell us tonight?    Oh go on   ;D

duke3016

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Re: Duke attempts the Impossible
« Reply #2480 on: September 14, 2010, 19:47:01 PM »

AMRN

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Re: Duke attempts the Impossible
« Reply #2481 on: September 14, 2010, 19:52:34 PM »

Waz1892

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Re: Duke attempts the Impossible
« Reply #2482 on: September 14, 2010, 19:58:09 PM »
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MAIR

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Re: Duke attempts the Impossible
« Reply #2483 on: September 14, 2010, 20:13:07 PM »
Mary Kivlin

duke3016

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Re: Duke attempts the Impossible
« Reply #2484 on: September 14, 2010, 20:41:45 PM »

duke3016

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Re: Duke attempts the Impossible
« Reply #2485 on: September 14, 2010, 20:51:02 PM »
I was at work today when I received a phone call from Marie. She of the wrap around finger fame.

"Hello daddy" says she
"Hi" says I
"Can you bring home some more cleaning cloths" says she
"Sure" says I
"I have cleaned the whole of the downstairs and your bedroom" says she
"Oh" says I
"Yes and I need more cloths to finish the rest of the house" says she "and a mop and bucket to do the floors"
"Oh" says I
"I am off to work now and will be back at 8.30 to finish off the cleaning" says she
"Oh" says I
"Oh yes and some heavy duty bleach so I can do all the toilets" says she
"Oh" says I
"See you later daddy, love you" says she and hangs up

I think my wallet will get an opening later or am I being cynical....

duke3016

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Re: Duke attempts the Impossible
« Reply #2486 on: September 14, 2010, 22:51:41 PM »
The wee man left to go into Chester during the day on Monday, I get a call to pick him up from said city this evening. Students eh. He gets into the car and his first utterance was.

"There is a reason why I smell of talcum powder"

The reason was flimsy -- lol

AAroddersAA

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Re: Duke attempts the Impossible
« Reply #2487 on: September 15, 2010, 09:44:10 AM »
-----------------------------

Still trying to think of something amusing to write in this bit.

Laxie

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Re: Duke attempts the Impossible
« Reply #2488 on: September 15, 2010, 09:46:03 AM »

The wee man left to go into Chester during the day on Monday, I get a call to pick him up from said city this evening. Students eh. He gets into the car and his first utterance was.

"There is a reason why I smell of talcum powder"

The reason was flimsy -- lol



LMAOOOOOOOOOO

Will have to poke holes in that on Friday for fun.  

KarmaDope

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Re: Duke attempts the Impossible
« Reply #2489 on: September 15, 2010, 11:10:35 AM »


The wee man left to go into Chester during the day on Monday, I get a call to pick him up from said city this evening. Students eh. He gets into the car and his first utterance was.

"There is a reason why I smell of talcum powder"

The reason was flimsy -- lol



LMAOOOOOOOOOO

Will have to poke holes in that on Friday for fun. 


Definitely.

What time you landing Lax?
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