Today is Halloween and as usual I will look forward to badly dressed, snotty urchins knocking on my door, with their pushy parents standing at the end of the drive. No imagination, no tricks just a grubby hand held out for sweets. A sneer when the bowl has small packets of sweets, a mumbled "skinflint" when no money is offered. The friendly "smack" as the egg hits the window, the indignant replies when I offer suggestions about their parents' marital status.
Tonight the curtains will be drawn, the main lights will be off and a bucket of warm urine will be poised on the upstairs window ledge attached to a length of string tightly held in my hand.
Bring em on..............