Duke attempts the Impossible

[duke3016]

Well did our esteemed Prime Minister take his two feet and plant them squarely in his mouth or what. I wonder if it will be brought up at the debate tonight.

oh and typing up the Anne O"Neill conclusion - be with you soon

[duke3016]

Well you know how it is with relationships, the probability of them working can be gauged fairly early on. No matter how compatible you think you are it's rare that your feelings change for the better as you go deeper into said relationship. More often than not, they change for the worst which then sours the whole atmosphere and you end bitter enemies.

In my own mind, it was not going to work with Anne. Not because of the family feud, FFS I could hold my own in that department and if I couldn't there was always the option of sending my Mother into the fray. It was not because of the ribbing I was getting and the remarks about marriage, it just didn't feel right. Don't get me wrong she was drop dead gorgeous and amazing company but there was something missing. Was it love, I had no idea at the time and if I ever get round to talking about my first marriage you will understand that I am a world champion when it comes to confusing Love and Lust.

So it was with a fair bit of trepidation that I decided that this friendship had to end and I was going to tell her that night.

"FFS did you swallow a wasp" says the ould lad, as I got ready to go out. Do you know if they made insensitivity an Olympic sport the ould lad would be a shoe in for gold. My mother on the other hand seemed to sense something like all mothers do and kept her counsel.

I picked her up and we drove down to the beach making small talk on the way. Was I doing the right thing, as her presence seemed to easily lift my melancholic mood. Taking a breath I said.

"I have something to say" says I
"No, I have something to say first" says she

I shut my trap and looked at her.

"There is no easy way to say this" says she "But I feel this relationship is going nowhere"

FFS I was being dumped, now, I should have felt elation that the chore I was going to perform was being done for me. I should have been relieved that we were mutually parting and would remain friends with no bitterness. Well, all I could think of was, how dare she, I was going to do that. What a wicked, wicked thought.

Good sense prevailed and the bad thoughts disappeared as the situation was resolving itself and we could get on with our lives. In my case fecking it up, but that's another story.

We had a great old chat and replayed the last few days and had a great old laugh. Do I regret not trying harder, no, I really have very few regrets, my actions are my own and I live with the consequences. As we parted for the last time and as I prepared to find Darby and Joan and stop them wrecking the nearest lounge bar. She turned to me.

"I have made this known to my family" says she
"OK" says I "Were they relieved that their little girl was not marrying a reprobate"
"Well the ould lad did ask if you would still come up once a week for the rumble"

Priceless.........

[duke3016]

Got a letter from HMRC today mailed to Chezger Ltd. I have a limited company but it didn"t trade of the last 12 months. I had the devil"s own job filing returns for zero  

Anyway the letter starts.

"This notice shows the corrections I have made to your figures. There is no right of appeal against this notice"

Oh Oh

Bottom line is

Amount Payable 0.00


Great correction then -- Priceless...........

[duke3016]

Woke up this morning and had something I haven"t had in a long time.

I had toast with seedless Rasberry Jam - lovely  

ps - what were you expecting

[MAIR]

LOL as always gr8 blog Ger

[Laxie]

"Food" was the first thing came to my mind.  

[technolog]

I thought it might be a full fridge and no empties but then I thought, no, don"t be ridiculous.

[duke3016]

[duke3016]

FFS he opens the gate I get to take care of his pang of conscience and undo his silly act. My mother looked at me as if to say "WTF is he on about".

"Don't go there" says I walking out to my car.

I drove down the Limerick road, as I neared Marty's house I could see him standing by the side of the road scratching his head. Not wanting to let on I knew what was up, I drove past him and gave him the pre-requisite wave. He absentmindedly lifted his hand in response and went back to scratching his head.

As I rounded the next bend I was confronted by a car frantically flashing his lights. I was near the cattle then. Sure enough I came across around 5 cattle in the road. Now Marty had nearer to 30 head of cattle, so where were the rest.

I stopped the car and got out. Going to the far side of the cattle I proceed to drive this bunch back up the road towards Marty's. Not long after Marty was in sight. He reached me quickly.

"These your beasts Marty" says I
"Aye some of them" says he
"How did they get out" says I without a trace of a smile
"Some fecker opened the gate" says he
"Who would do a thing like that" says I
"No idea, but if I get my hands on him" says he leaving the outcome to my imagination.

I filed that under the heading of "Ould Lad blackmail" and continued to help Marty put these cattle in the field.

"Did you see the rest of them Ger" says he
"No but they can't have gone far" says I
"Aye" says he
"Do you want a hand looking for them" says I
"That'll be great, thanks" says he

We walked back to my car and as we were about to get in Marty stared into the distance.

"There they are in Malloy's field" says he

Sure enough they there were at the top of the field about a half mile away, munching on the rich grass of Malloy's meadow.

"Right, let's go get them" says I
"Pity to disturb them" says Marty eyeing the rich grass in the field.
"Marty!" says I
"Ok Ok let's get them" says he

We walked in the field with the intention of driving them towards the road.

Contd.
Next.
24 obliging cattle
1 Fecker of a bull not so obliging
1 broken collar bone
1 world record 100 metre dash
1 world record tree climb

[duke3016]

[duke3016]

Another silver medal last night. It was good to get a bit of luck for a change. I was down to dirt at one stage and managed to drift up to be chip leader on the final table. The final table seemed to be all in or fold, not sure why but I managed to escape most of the carnage.

Well done to Warren on his Gold and Maxine for the Bronze. Warren took Max out when JJ held against AJ.

My silver exit was unlucky, but then I think I had used my luck up earlier on. Don't think I could have played the final hand differently so not too upset.

NL Texas Hold'em $50 Buy-in + $0 Entry Fee, Level:24 Blinds(10,000/20,000-2,000 ante) - Sunday, May 02, 00:13:12 GMT 2010
APAT Central European Championship #384291
Table 1 9-max (Real Money)

BB: Tyl3rDurden ( 754,045.20 )
Button: duke9999 ( 145,954.80 )
Tourney Level:24 Blinds(10,000/20,000-2,000 ante)
Tyl3rDurden posts ante [2,000]
duke9999 posts ante [2,000]
duke9999 posts small blind [10,000]
Tyl3rDurden posts big blind [20,000]

Preflop: duke9999 is dealt K?, Q?

duke9999 raises to 75,000, Tyl3rDurden calls 55,000

Flop: 7?, Q?, 4?

Tyl3rDurden bets all in 677,045.20,  duke9999 calls all in 68,954.80, Returning uncalled bet 608,090.40 to Tyl3rDurden

**Showdown**

Tyl3rDurden shows 6?, A?
duke9999 shows K?, Q?

Turn: 2?

River: A?

Tyl3rDurden wins 291,909.60 from main pot with a pair of Aces  

[duke3016]

Right, off to my sister"s today for her stupendous Sunday lunch and a few beers, life is good

[cincicrappykid]

Another silver medal last night. It was good to get a bit of luck for a change. I was down to dirt at one stage and managed to drift up to be chip leader on the final table. The final table seemed to be all in or fold, not sure why but I managed to escape most of the carnage.

Well done to Warren on his Gold and Maxine for the Bronze. Warren took Max out when JJ held against AJ.

My silver exit was unlucky, but then I think I had used my luck up earlier on. Don't think I could have played the final hand differently so not too upset.

NL Texas Hold'em $50 Buy-in + $0 Entry Fee, Level:24 Blinds(10,000/20,000-2,000 ante) - Sunday, May 02, 00:13:12 GMT 2010
APAT Central European Championship #384291
Table 1 9-max (Real Money)

BB: Tyl3rDurden ( 754,045.20 )
Button: duke9999 ( 145,954.80 )
Tourney Level:24 Blinds(10,000/20,000-2,000 ante)
Tyl3rDurden posts ante [2,000]
duke9999 posts ante [2,000]
duke9999 posts small blind [10,000]
Tyl3rDurden posts big blind [20,000]

Preflop: duke9999 is dealt K?, Q?

duke9999 raises to 75,000, Tyl3rDurden calls 55,000

Flop: 7?, Q?, 4?

Tyl3rDurden bets all in 677,045.20,  duke9999 calls all in 68,954.80, Returning uncalled bet 608,090.40 to Tyl3rDurden

**Showdown**

Tyl3rDurden shows 6?, A?
duke9999 shows K?, Q?

Turn: 2?

River: A?

Tyl3rDurden wins 291,909.60 from main pot with a pair of Aces  

lol sure did called an allin with aj ,,,,,fish both of us sitting 3rd and 4th

[Laxie]

Dinner at sister"s when ya haven"t finished yer tale yet?!  

Contd.
Next.
24 obliging cattle
1 Fecker of a bull not so obliging
1 broken collar bone
1 world record 100 metre dash
1 world record tree climb

Oh, and don"t forget the Munster match is on today.  

[duke3016]

lol sure did called an allin with aj ,,,,,fish both of us sitting 3rd and 4th

yes not one of my better plays, if I recall you raised x3bb and I re raised something like 30k, you shoved and I made a dubious call (we were 5 handed   ). And we were second and third in chips, i"ll try and find the hand and post if for the usual constructive comments.