When I was in my first disastrous marriage I took to coming home late at night in a usually futile effort to avoid confrontation. One particular night I was ambling home at about 3am, after a few sherbets, when Guard Daley stopped me in the street.
"Have you been drinking Ger" says he
"Yes" says I
"Where" says he
"Ah Peadar, now I couldn't be telling you that" says I
"Ok so where are you going now" says he
"I"m on the way to a lecture about the effects of alcohol abuse on the human body." says I
"Oh Really? And who"s going to give a lecture at this time of the morning?" says he
"My wife," says I
